This blog is a transcription of a twenty minute voice memo I took while getting drinks with my friends, Bryce, Connor, Jesse, and Kelsey. It was an attempt to deliver something new; I didn’t realize how many words would be spoken.
Everyones name will be abbreviated to their first initial.
Here are two photos so you can get a feel for the space and insert yourself into the environment while reading.


Q: Alright Bryce, how would you, describe, how would you describe your whole night? Go through it all.
B: The whole night? There hasn’t been a whole night?
Q: Today.
K: Starts at like 5 pm.
B: Today? Oh like starting now
Q: Like, how did you feel before you walked in? Describe everything about today.
K: Was the haircut today?
J: No.
B: Two days ago.
B: What are you asking me?
Q: From when you got in the car, to leave, take me through the last two hours for you.
B: Oh just what I’ve done?
Q: Yeah.
B: I got in my car.
Q: Okay.
B: I remember you said you didn’t have a car, so I picked up a couple fries off the floor. Threw those in the dumpster.
Q: Nice.
B: I drove here and noticed my front left tires, like low again, it’s pulling to the left.
J: Wait your front left?
Q: His car pulls to the left because he doesn't have air in his front tire.
B: I have to fill it everyday-
J: You, how is your front tire holding any air then if it’s affecting-
B: I don’t know
J: You probably just need an alignment that’s probably what it is
C, K, Q: laughs
B: NO, because I check the PSI it’s like 10. I can hear it go brrrr when I go to the gas station
C, K, Q: more laughs
J: You’re gonna like lose that tire.
K: Why don’t you get a new tire?
C: That’s a good question, I like Kelsey’s question.
B: I don’t know, I really don’t-
J: Or just get the hole patched.
K: you’re going to end up in a bad situation-
B: No, because the day it happens I’ll send a picture to work and be like woah it’s a nice surprise, just waiting to happen.
J: Oh yea you’ll love the day that that happens.
C: Is this (the song playing in the background) U2?
J: No it’s they Q: You mean “you as well?”
K: No-
B: No the band U2.
K: Don’t be a prick.
Q: Sorry sorry sorry, keep going.
B: Then I arrived here
-Note to Reader, this is one minute and 20 seconds into the recording-
B: Parked right there, and worried about the Molly Goodhead’s parking, I’m gonna get towed, they have a sign that says they’ll tow you. I stepped on that wood to get over, I stepped on that wood and it cracked and bowed, I was like that's really embarrassing, so many people probably just saw that and thought what an idiot-
J: Because you could’ve just walked around it.
B: It's like you, no, you had to go like, you can't there's another railing.. And then I came over here sat down.
Q: And then?
B: had some Beers.
Q: Any of note?
B: Peanut butter, Motor, Lube.
J: And then?
Q: Do you have any moments that, like, stick out?
B: Charizard, Jesse? points to the back of Jesse’s phone case where a Charizard pokemon card is tucked neatly
Q: Nice.
C: Wait remember when it was just us three out here (Connor, Jesse, Bryce)
B: Oh, we talked about fishing. Jesse did not have a fun fact.
J: That's not true. I said I've been attacked by a chicken before.
Q: Good answer.
C: It's like a guard dog, but it's not.
Q: to Bryce is that just about it?
B: referencing earlier moments Drone. I gotta say bye Bobby summer. I gotta say goodbye to mommy. Irish hello, Irish goodbye. Honk Honk. Yup. Big Scary Dog. Nice dog eating bone.
Q: Connor, you go. take us through your day..
C: My day-
Q: Doesn't have to be the whole day.
C: Okay, well, I went to bed around 1
K: woahhh
Q: Jeeeesus Christ we’re starting from midnight
C: I made vegetable lentil soup
Q: Did you actually?
C: Yeah.
B: What?
Q: Nathan asked her on the phone how she felt about lentils,
but it was just a random word, and I guess that inspired her to make lentil soup?
J: What if you gave up lentils for Lent?
C: That would be crazy because it has such great fiber content.
K: What did you give up?
C: Nothing? I apologize I apologize I gave up giving up apologize,
J: Lord, please forgive me.
C: I celebrate Easter, I just didn't get the memo, I didn't go to Ash Wednesday.
B: Easter happened?
Q: insane laugh
C: No it’s-
J: Does that make up for if you have lentil soup?
K: laugh
C: No, but like, thank you for thinking that… had that went to bed, woke up, yoga, saw Gus at yoga today. He said, “what the fuck are you doing here?” And I said, “well Gus, because I didn't get to go to Valspar with you”, and he got confused. This ties into a later comment he makes. He said, “wait, you were there, you should have said hi”. I said, “no.” went to yoga, did yoga. Made breakfast. It was great. Then went back to take a little bit of a nap woke up, got ready for this. Kelsey came over then left, we went, we saw you. saw Gus here. He said “Connor. if you really want to go to Valspar all you have to do is ask”. I said, “no, no, no, I don't”. And, um, I don't like golf, and then we ended up back here again.
K: To Bryce Stop scrolling, stop scrolling.
B: Look up, looks back down, scrolls
Everyone: Laughs
Q: All right, keep going.,
silence
J: Oh God, no. It's, it's all messed up.
C: had drinks-
J: pointing towards a large pit bull roaming the brewery
He’s free range, He's still got his balls.
Q: “He’s free range, he’s still got his balls”
B: HAH he said that?
B, Q: Laugh
B: “He’s free range” god
C: we giggled, drank, were married, and then that’s it.
Q: Any memories from being here that specifically would stand out?
C: Kelsey and I went to the bathroom and that was hard for her, she mistook her stall for a handicapped stall because they were all of adequate size.
B: Oh that’s nice
J: Did you feel like an asshole for taking it?
K, C: No
B: Do you guys not use handicap stalls??
K: I said “I'm in the handicap stall” and she said “they're all the same.”
C: And then Bryce told me about his flies, Jesse showed me a picture of a bird
J: slaps his leg
K: Do you just keep slapping mosquitoes?
J: No-see-ums, but yeah. Sorry I wore shorts!
Q: Those are handsome shorts.
K: He doesn’t even look, just slaps
J: Because I feel it. That's all that matters
Q: Anything else Con? Any closing thoughts?
C: I wanna put the dog, but I don't think that the dog wants to be-
J: I think he would be fine with it.
Q: All right, K-mart you’re up.
K: K-mart? What am I doing?
C:Recap, Recap
Q: What? What everyone else has been doing?
K: Well, everyone else did something different. That's why I'm asking.
Q: Just follow whatever the-
K: I went to my grandparents house this morning, I hung out of the pool with them and my parents and my sister and her boyfriend, and my sister's friend, Ashley. And then I came home, I walked Mac. I skedaddled to Connor's house, picked Connor up, found Quentin, picked him up,
J: Where’d you find him at?
K: His house where I’d expect him to be… No a little moment, I would say, seeing Gus in such a light that I've never seen before where he was like doing bits in the same way that Quentin and his brothers do bits. It really made me feel like he was just one of them and not, like, a real full grown adult
Q: He had a bag full of cheese.
J: Why did he have a bag full of cheese?
K: He took all the like free samples, so he had like 20
Q: He like brings a bag and he gets free-
J: Is he stealing?
Q: It was complimentary
B: The guy supplies sandwiches for the entire event, all right?
J: Okay, that's valid. That's payment. It's payment.
C: to Kelsey Did you mention the money?
B: You have money?
K: Oh, he gave us both like eight Chick-fil-a Coupons. Breakfast only.
C: One lunch.
K:Yeah, she got a lunch. I didn't get one.
B: Gus holds out with the Lunch
K: And here, I would say memorable moments is both of you two showing up, didn't expect this. After you didn't answer my call, I thought there's no way that he's gonna be here. But then I saw you walking up, and you to Jesse dressed for the Hamptons, good good job.
J: Hampton?
K: Yeah, look at you.
Q: To Jesse Alright, you're up.
J: Oh, wait, my life story, is that what I'm doing?
C: Yea
J: Okay, so-
Q: no, no, don't-
J: Uh, okay, last night, I text Quentin, “Go Crumb. I'm not gonna be there. I'm not doing anything. I'm tired”.. go to bed. almost fall asleep on the couch, take 10 hours to eat a pub sub. go to sleep on almost go to sleep on the couch, go to sleep at 2 in the morning. get woken up-
B: Wait! Can we backtrack a little bit?
J: Yeah.
B: You said you got a pub sub?
J: so uh, was gonna go out, Quentin crumbed instead-
B: Time, time
J: so uh probably nine-ish
C: no, no it can only be within this 24 hours.
Q: Oh, everyone's got a different everyone's got a different thing. I like the 24 hour.
B: I'm noticing a pattern.
Q: What’s the pattern
B: He loves a late night meal.
J: I always eat like late night.
Q: He's like an owl
B: That’s crazy
Q: You’ll never see him eat either, he hides it and takes the food home
B: Because why?
Q: Because he wants to be comfortable.
J: I home, get situated, you know
B: What is situated?!
Q: dude, you don't know, bro.
K: Do you do couch, table, or bed?
J: Either, it depends on if if people are home, if people are home, I'll go in bedroom and eat at desk, if people are not home, I will eat a countertop in kitchen.
B: Do you like watch shows or something?
J: Yes, I would watch a YouTube video.
B: Be completely open, no judging. What do you watch on YouTube? Sidemen?
Q: The loudest laugh of the night
J: I watch, like a billion things all at one time.
Q: You don’t watch a Sidemen Sunday three hour video cheap versus expensive Ibiza trip?
B: That’s what we’re gonna do tonight, we’re gonna drink a bunch of beer and watch Sidemen
Q: You want to I’ll do it
B: Alright we’re going to, I have forty beers at my house
Q: Sorry Jesse, sorry to interrupt
-
And with that, I end my transcription. This was 12 minutes of the conversation. I felt this was a good place to end because Bryce, Kelsey, and I, did in fact watch Sidemen Sunday. We watched an hour and forty five minute video that was nothing but yelling. As always, Thank you for reading, Love you guys.